Yes you should talk to your girls about their bodies!!!

There has been an article making the social media rounds. The advice given is "the best way to talk to your daughter about her body is to not talk to her about her body..." Now it has bothered me since I first read it. I reread it yesterday just to make sure I didn't miss something. Most of the intentions are admirable. I love encouraging our princesses to rule the world, to use their brains, to feel empowered.

But here's the rub, as with all things in raising children, if you don't talk about the hard things, somebody else will. Do you need proof?

My eldest princess began kindergarten this year. Within two weeks, my beautiful little girl whispered one night, "mommy, I wish I had a different face..."

I was in total shock. This beautiful little girl I had nurtured and protected had already experienced what I prayed against. "Why do you say that? What kind of face do you want baby? What is it that you don't like about your face?" Then came the final blow, the word I had kept outside the walls of my home; "my face is too fat." 💔 I was a pile of rubble.

Every day, in pageant land, I hear these young ladies speak in the same manner. It is already apart of their mental structure. They can't help it, just like you, Mama. You can't help but glare at that mommy belly in the mirror as you pine for those high school or college days when you swore you were fat but clearly you were quite perfect in that spring break bikini. You see this is not a head-in-the-sand situation. It is not a phase. This is the foundation for her life-long relationship with her jean size. How will you frame that foundation?

Earlier this month, that same sweet child of mine asked "mommy, why do you workout?" (MAYDAY MAYDAY TEACHING MOMENT AHEAD, said my brain). "Because I want to be strong enough to hold you as you grow. And also, I want to stay healthy so that I can play with your babies some day." She skipped away perfectly content with me answer. (Thank God, I was in a flop sweat.) I assumed it floated in one ear and out the other, per usual. That is until this past Tuesday as her ballet class was finishing up. They were playing a run and leap game having to leap over a set amount of space. My tiny little sunburst took off in a dead sprint and leaped with all her might. She cleared the space. "Wow, you have some strong legs!" said the teacher. My princess whipped around and met my eyes. She was bordering on supernova-level of beaming. She was proud to have strong legs. Thank you, Jesus, she heard me. #momvictory.

I know this is a tense and potentially dangerous subject. The landmines are everywhere and we want to get it just right. If we do, maybe we can guard our angels against the pain we have endured. The feelings of less-than, of being irrevocably flawed. Everyone I know has a story. But here's the painful truth, "hurt people, hurt people." There is going to be some snotty little kid, some insecure boy, or someone who is just plain malicious who hurls a comment at her and it will stick. She will probably shed a tear or two but will it stay with her? If you laid a solid foundation of confidence and comfort in who she is, that comment will sting but it will not break her.

This is why you HAVE TO talk to your girls about their bodies. Teach them what it means to be healthy, active, strong. Teach them how to fuel their bodies not just to mindlessly eat (or worse yet, not eat at all). SHOW them that a powerful woman has a strong mind, body and spirit. In my very humble (early) mommy opinion, this is how we build a world of capable and powerful women.

📷:Laura Jennings Photography